Recent Abbrevation entries in the dictionary

Bull market: a random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
 
Bear market: a six- to eight-month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewellery and the husband gets no sex.
 
Momentum investing: the fine art of buying high and selling low.
 
Value investing: the art of buying low and selling lower.
 
P/E ratio: the percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
 
Broker: poorer than you were last year.
 
Buy, buy: a flight attendant making market recommendations as you step off the plane.
 
Standard and Poor (S&P): your life in a nutshell.
 
Stock analyst: idiot who just downgraded your stock.
 
Stock split: when your former wife and her lawyer split all your assets equally between themselves.
 
Market correction: the day after you buy stocks.
 
Cash flow: the movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
 
Institutional investor: past year investor who is now locked up in a nut house.
 
EBITDA: earnings before I tricked the dumb auditor.
 
EBIT: earnings before irregularities and tampering.
 
CEO: chief embezzlement officer.
 
CFO: chief fraud officer.
 
EPS: eventual prison sentence